I’m As Mad As Hell About ‘The Rules’! You Should Be Too.

I’m as mad as hell, and I’m not going to take this anymore!

Yes, the famous line from the movie Network. Network’s news anchor-main character and I have something in common. I’m as mad as hell, too. I’ve had enough and I’m not going to take it lying down anymore. I’ve had it up to here with the so-called rules which supposedly govern how you date and the problematic relationships the rules create.

Why do “the rules” presume that men and women are so different that harmonious relationships are impossible? Why does it takes years to grow and mature a good marriage? Why do the rules say that daters must play “the game” to lure and capture the prize? Why is it said that deep, romantic love is a fantasy, a latent artifact of childhood fairy tales?

I’m sick of it! Do you hear me?! I’m sick of listening to Dr. Phil tell you to compromise. I’m deathly weary of the 50 year old relationship paradigm that keeps you from finding the right mate for true happiness. I’m over watching you mindlessly trod the traditional dating and relationship path like a lemming into the Sea of Discontentment.

I’m sick of it and starting today, it changes. Beginning today, I propose a new “first word” in relationships—a word that supersedes all others in the vocabulary of togetherness. No, that word is not ‘love’ or even ‘understanding’. The single word which I proclaim the highest and most important to all relationships is:


Nobody–not your friends, or your parents, or the relationship experts–should be permitted to proclaim any message that sets a limit on what you can achieve in either dating or relationships. Instead, whenever a so-called expert utters another cliché edict, you should roll down your window and scream at the top of your lungs “WHY”?!

You can’t hurry love.


You’ll never truly understand her.


Relationships are work.


Whether you realize it or not, the foundation for today’s relationship and all those so-called rules was laid more than 50 years ago. Imagine how much has changed in the last 50 years! The World Wide Web replaced encyclopedias. Cell phones replaced landlines. Cable television replaced the antenna. The microwave replaced the oven. Medical science replaced your Aunt Tessie’s hip.

Everything has changed, except relationships. Although the reasons why we marry and what we expect out of relationships has changed, the relationship itself has not. You labor under the same misconceptions as your parents and grandparents did when they dated. In the 1950s, dating was a long, amorphous process, and so it is today. Why? In both the Age of Aquarius and the Age of Information, arguments are expected and healthy. Why? Five decades ago relationships were compromise, friction, and work, just like they are today. WHY?!

The problems of the world cannot possibly be solved by skeptics and cynics, whose horizons are limited by the obvious realities. We need men who can dream of things that never where and ask “why not”.   – John F. Kennedy

A man of great vision and inspiration, Kennedy knew that the rules are not immutable and that all we need do to escape the gravity of our circumstances is to ask “why”.

Love is no different. The old paradigms are not cast in stone like some mathematical constant. To begin to see the myths for what they are, you must start by asking why it is that way. Asking “why” is the only way to separate the truth from the contrivances–to find what is certain and real.

When it comes to relationships, I know this truth: If you want to find a partner with whom you’ll share an unparalleled, deep, harmonious love, you need to begin with a different kind of relationship.

Ask me why.

About Troy

After divorcing from a 22 year traditional relationship of compromise, friction, and work, Troy discovered the Mirror Effect on a first date. The discovery had such a profound impact that it completely changed his views on dating and relationships.

Using the Mirror Effect, when Troy found Judy, their connection was so strong that they fell in love on their first date and were engaged in two months. Together now for five years, they share a deep love relationship of ease and harmony without the work.

Together with Team Bloved, Troy and Judy work to put people on a path to finding someone who is naturally meant for them. Through the Bloved 1-Day Event and their book, The Mirror Effect: More Than Soul Mates (6 Steps To Finding Your Magical Match Using Online Dating), singles discover how to find a different type of relationship — one which has an epic love, profound connection, and 99% harmony. It’s a love that feels so magical that it can no longer be called a relationship: it’s a Loveship.

Troy’s email box is always open! He enthusiastically encourages you to reach out with your questions or comments. troy@bloved.com.

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